Lousy"

I had slept on bed for an hour,

but the eyes never close.

'couldn't sleep again' :(

I have made my life with lousy.

Hope somethings can turn back,

to allow me have chances to try.

To have a happiness home,

No argument.

i have friends

but not taking granted from each other's friends.

My chest pain, what happen?

never mind...

nothing can let me nostalgia..

nobody want to care about me~

\\It might be a Fate\\

Many people (especially ladies) said " there has no good man"...

But i said "got"

I saw many through my eyes ~

But, why i have no the chance to meet good man?

If no chance is okay for me...

the point is why i met and i chose are im not 'his' only 1?

what are the problems on me?

make you away me---

Enough~

i shouldn't take it.

This LOVE might not in my life... Fate~

Be abandon by...

No one can be trusted~

im sad.

i want to give up.

Just a Heart

finished work at 1130pm.

reached room at 12.10am.

he sent choc ice cream... at 1259am (5.4.11)

before he com, he had asked me " do u wan supper?"

actually i very hungry @@"... but i said "don't want."

signal on-- stomach~ keep 'ringing'

he delivered...

**march-->

8.3.11 : 2.00am ++ : noodle + tao fu fa + chic wings

9.3.11 : 1.00am ++ : McD

13.3.11 : 8.00pm ++ : noodle

16.3.11 : 1.50am : egg roll with seaweed and shredded pork

18.3.11 : 9.39am : McD

20.3.11 : 12.00am : fried dong fun

30.3.11 : 11.30pm ++ : "watermelon"

31.3.11 : 11.38pm : "melon"

this few days can't sleep well.

so tired. tired of my life...

so many things happen.

i need shoulder to let me lean, which with fully truly by his heart...

i cant control, want to drink~..

luckily to day OT...

if not waste money to do bad hobby.

i have totally no confidence on myself.

i scare when somethings on my hand will easily fly away.

even a person.

even he pay his love by his heart.

i scare~

this is the problem,

i know it will let him go,

cause of believable & unbelievable.

so tat,

i think that is one of the problem that i cant hold a person.

is it?

I ALWAYS say i don't want any promises.

but my heart need.

no gut to accept..

hurt so bad"

if you who love me...

hope you know & understand--- i need 'promises' actually.

when you promise-- from your heart PLEASE!

when i in thinking of grey~

few 'model' that had show me that:

"still got in the world.

they treat their family very well,

they treat their partner full of care,

they love 'her' so much,

Just A HEART... ^^

today, cant sleep too : (